2009 Wrap-up

So here we are, at the end of possibly the most thrilling, exhausting, unexpectedly exciting year yet of our nearly 3-year relationship. One year ago we were not yet engaged (though Darryl had just picked-up the ring), we had just gotten Dewey but did not yet have Ginger, we lived ten minutes away from each other, Darryl had just finished his BA at Vanguard and had not yet been accepted to UCR, we had no idea we would be traveling to Chicago, or anywhere else for that matter, our flower girl had not yet been born, and Darryl's X-box was fresh out of the package having been shipped through UPS where he still worked hideous holiday hours. The list of significant events over the past year alone goes on and on, and it's truly hard to imagine what this upcoming year has to offer.

Two major events to catch-up on: Chicago and the dress...

We took our first vacation together to Chicago back in November! I had vacation time to use up, and Darryl had the week off of school for Thanksgiving, so we hopped on a plane and went to visit our fabulous hosts, Justin and Meesa. I was hesitant at first, since we are trying to save up for a wedding afterall, but we needed to get away and have a real adventure before the craziness of this upcoming year begins. Chicago totally lived-up to my high expectations, since I've never met anyone who has been there and hated it, and made us greatly miss good public transportation, chilly weather, old buildings, and the other perks of city life when we returned to the OC.

One of the most exciting things we did on our trip was visit the Macy's bridal salon, the biggest and oldest department store I think I have ever seen, and the only one that has a bridal department in the country.

I had mentioned to Meesa before we arrived that the Macy's in downtown Chicago had a bridal salon and that if we had time we might try to sneek in and try-on a dress or two for the fun of it. Meesa, being as wedding crazy as I am, squealed with glee via AIM and when we were wandering around town our second night there, we stopped by to see if they were open. As it turns out, Chicago has two Macy's and we were at the wrong one. So we traveled all the way to the correct location, the one by the Chicago Theater where we took our (awesome!) Chicago sign pictures, only to find that the bridal department was already closed for the day, but they had fliers out advertising their sample sale which started the following morning by appointment only. So the plan was then to return to the apartment and call them in the morning to see if there was some slim chance they actually had an appointment slot available the next afternoon. So as luck would have it, I called early the next morning and was actually able to get an official appointment for my very first dress shopping extravaganza in the one-and-only Macy's bridal salon! I honestly felt kind of guilty since I had no plans of actually buying a dress and knew I would probably just be wasting some poor consultant's time, and had... well, lied.. about my exact wedding date since I knew if I said "June, 2011" they would never take me seriously because only a crazy person would buy her dress over 18 months before her expected wedding date...right?

So, after touring the Shedd Aquarium and browsing downtown and Millenium Park once again, we (me, Meesa, and yes, Darryl) headed boldly in the direction of Macy's. We were about forty minutes early so while Darryl searched the 30-something floors for a restroom, Meesa and I took a look at the selection of bridesmaids dresses. They definitely left something to be desired... like taste, or style perhaps. This made me rather concerned about their possible selection of bridal gowns, but even if all I tried on that day were horrible dresses, we'd still have fun doing it. Then they told me I could start looking at the gowns on display for ideas and at the racks of sample gowns for sale, most of which were 50% off or more. Once again, I was a bit underwhelmed. The gowns on display were just not my style and were insanely overpriced, and most of the sample gowns were stained, damaged, or just laughably ugly. My consultant came out and asked if I had seen anything I'd like to try on, and on a whim I picked a lace dress off the rack because I liked the train, but didn't have high hopes for it. It was the very first dress I tried on...

And as cheesy as it sounds, I knew right when she zipped it up and I saw myself in the mirror that this was my dress. Of course I didn't say that right then; afterall, this was the only dress I had ever tried on, so how was I supposed to know it was the one? But out of all the dresses I had this one on the longest since the consultant was gathering other gowns for me to try, and so we had plenty of time to admire it and for more people to walk-by and gasp with approval (which I'll admit felt pretty darn good). But then it was time to move on to more dresses...

Dress #2 was a cinderella-like ball gown, which I don't have a picture of, but lets just say it brought out my inner-disney-princess-sparkle-cupcake.

Dress #3: This dress was actually what I kind of assumed I would like for a pretty long time - mermaid/trumpet sillhouette, straps, silk taffeta, and some beading but not all over the gown. As it turns out, I was wrong. While it did give me a version of my figure I did not know existed, I was ready to move-on and try on the next one.

Dress #4: Once again, this dress was something that could have been a possibility in my mind, and I was wrong. Very wrong. It basically replaced my chest with fabric petals.

Dress #5 (I think I messed-up the order, oops): This one was actually a close contender with the first dress. I liked the shape of it, and there was some but not a lot of beading, but it still just didn't quite seem me.

Dresses #6 & 7: The last two dresses were, well, not worth getting pictures of, except for maybe comic relief (and I think the consultant was starting to notice Meesa taking pictures with my iPhone behind her back, hehe). The were both polyester, both had a giant fake flower on the side, had clear plastic beading, and the last one was topped off with a black velvet sash at the waist. It's amazing what can still cost over a thousand dollars these days.

So then my hour was up and the consultant made no assumptions about me buying any of the gowns since I had mentioned that we were from California and were on vacation, but she was cool about it and just gave me the sku numbers for the two dresses that I liked so that I could try to find them online. I got back into my street clothes and stared at the first dress which was still on the rack in the dressing room. I really liked it. The more I thought about it, the more perfect it actually was, lack of beading and all. It had kind of a vintage feel, but without being old-fashioned, if that's possible. I walked back out to Darryl and Meesa, still mulling over the dress, and ended up going back in the room to take it back to the racks outside so we could look at it again. I agonized over it for a good 45 minutes or so, wondering if I should just take it, or deal with trying to find it somewhere back home, probably not at the sample sale 50% off price, or not finding it at all and trying to get a similar dress by another designer. By this time I'd attracted the attention of my consultant again, as well as her coworker, who stood back and analyzed my dilemma for themselves. There was no pressure from them, just my own paranoia about not being able to let this dress go. Even Darryl loved the dress, but it was up to me to make the final call. So then I said it: Alright, I'll take it, I'm saying yes to the dress! Everyone in the room cheered, I signed the paperwork, she swiped my credit card (afterwhich I had to call the customer service line in India to tell CapitalOne that I was, indeed, in Chicago making a major purchase, afterwhich the guy on the other end extended his congratulations), and then the dress was mine.

There was just one little issue: we were still in the middle of downtown Chicago and were not planning on heading back to the apartment right away since we were meeting Justin at a place to have Chicago-style hotdogs for dinner. So, Darryl carried my plastic-wrapped dress all over the city, on the subway and all, for the rest of the evening, until we returned and had to pack it with the rest of our luggage on the flight back home the next morning. The good news is that the dress survived, and although it still needs to be altered and cleaned, it's still my perfect dress and I have no regrets whatsoever.

I do, of course, realize that there are many people who wanted to be there when I bought my dress, but I promise that there will be an appropriate reveal after it's altered and the design is finalized. I also realize that I broke a pretty major tradition of not allowing the groom to see the bride in her gown before the wedding, but I was actually already considering that before I even booked the flights to Chicago. Darryl was watching Say Yes to the Dress with me one day, and he mentioned the possibility of shopping for my dress with me, and after I thought about it for awhile, it made perfect sense. Brides go bridal shopping with their best clothes shopping buddy, and for me that is Darryl, and it would have been an even harder decision without him there to say he loved it. I wouldn't trade the fun experience I had that day for anything.

Done with one year, and on to the next. This year will have much more in store for the wedding as we get closer and closer to the big day. Let's keep a tally of how many times I change my mind on color schemes, shall we... or maybe a drinking game would be more like it. Happy New Year and cheers to 2010!

Floralific

In an effort to be more like a real bridal blog, I decided to make an inspiration board of my favorite florals for the big day: pink peonies, billy buttons, and garden roses. Ta-da!

Something Old

As everyone knows by now, my grandfather passed away earlier this week. He was really the only grandparent I ever had since my grandma and the other older relatives passed-on before I was born; this will also be the first funeral I will attend for one of my own family members. Most of my memories of him are of the couple of years when he picked me up from school everyday. Every single day he pulled up to my elementary school with a double cheeseburger, fries, and a rootbeer or a shake from Carl's Jr. It's a mystery how I wasn't obese. Then we would drive to my brother's high school and talk about my day until my brother made his way out to the car. I also remember when he speant a very long time in Toys 'R Us trying to pick-out a Barbie wedding dress for my birthday present one year. So while I can't say we always had very much in common, I knew that he was always there for me no matter what, no questions asked.

To be completely honest, I was kind of surprised by how much his death has affected me since we had all been expecting it to happen for the past few months. After a lot of thinking and talking with Darryl, I think that it's because I now feel kind of disconnected from my past. While my family has always shared stories and old photographs of little bits of our family history, I don't think it ever mattered as much to me as it does now. It wasn't until now, in the midst of planning my wedding and beginning to form a new family with Darryl (and the cats), that I've become more curious about what happened way back when my grandparents, and great-grandparents, got married and made all kinds of decisions that sealed the fate of the family's future. All of the sudden it matters a lot more to me what happened to my grandmother's wedding dress and rings, or my great-grandmother's antique dishes. Sure, I have tons of stuff from my own mother, as well as little things from my childhood that I'm saving just in case we have a daughter someday, but it would be nice to find something from our earliest known history to feel a connection to.

So while I am going to try and hunt down some of those things, ultimately I can focus on the memories I alone have, and also on the fact that Darryl and I can create those kinds of heirlooms for our own kids and grandkids so that they can have "something old" for their wedding days.

Fall Update

I know, I know, it's been a very long time since my last blog. It's a good thing I don't have one of those bridal blogs with sponsors and such or else they would have all left by now. Honestly, I really have been busy. This is probably the hardest and most time consuming semester of my degree. After this quarter it should be smooth-sailing, so hopefully more blogs will follow.

Also, my whole office went to San Francisco for a weekend, which was a very nice break from the normal day-to-day, but proved to not tame my travel lust but to make it greater. So the good news is that Darryl and I will be taking our first real vacation together in November to Chicago to visit Justin and Meesa for three blisteringly cold days. I was hesitant to drop that much cash on plane tickets when we are supposed to be saving for our wedding (606 days from today), but truth be told, if all I do is focus on the wedding this early in the game, I will surely lose my mind. Thus, the trip is a much needed distraction, not to mention one of those rare opportunities to travel to a new place, and to buy cute outerwear.

Darryl's student teaching is well underway now. Despite the exhaustion of actually teaching classes all day in addition to still having night classes, he loves teaching and is very happy with his career move. We went to our very first high school dance (seriously, ever) last weekend as chaperones and discovered that we didn't miss much as teenagers. Maybe winter formal will be better. Homecoming consisted of sitting at a table with the other student teachers, watching a door which security opened up later anyway, for four hours. We learned two things: DJs are still using the same music that was popular when we were in high school, and teenagers dancing is like watching a big group of little animals in heat. I feel so old.

Personally, I've decided that if I can't handle teaching one day, I'll become a pastry chef. Some back-up plan, right? I've recently discovered that I'm actually pretty good at cake decorating, even the more complicated stuff. Making things pretty with icing is like a zen experience, as long as you don't get too stressed-out by it. Pastry school would be fun and exciting, but is very expensive. Maybe if we win the lottery or retire rich I could have my very own little cupcake and wedding patisserie. Rest assured, though, I'm not crazy enough to try and make my own wedding cake; we'll leave that to the professionals. In the mean time, you can all expect some very impressive birthday cakes in the future.

The Benedict Castle

Today Darryl and I took a tour of the place we were considering using as our ceremony venue: the Benedict Castle on the grounds of Teen Challenge in Riverside. We had seen a video about it online, and had heard from different sources that it was a really neat wedding location. I had also contacted the castle coordinator, Ardee, and received a bunch of info on it a few months ago. The whole two year thing still earned us a couple of confused remarks, but I figured it was never too early to get the venues straightened out since that pretty much determines everything else about the big day.

One thing that is important to remember about this location is that it is on the grounds of a drug rehabilitation center run by the Assemblies of God church, which is actually one of the best programs in the country. Apparently it's not where the people going through the first phase of rehab are, but the people in the second phase of recovery, meaning that they're off drugs and putting their lives back together. Part of that often involves working on the grounds of Teen Challenge, and I gathered that the two guys who let us in were in recovery judging by their overall demeanor, but they were very helpful and I've heard that the entire staff there is very accomodating and nice. One of them was starting to set up for a wedding that's taking place tomorrow and is the worship leader for their chapel services; he said he would be there the day of our wedding, assuming he's still there in two years, to set up all of the sound equipment and run it for us, which was nice to know. Another nice thing about this location, unlike the Mission Inn chapel next to our reception venue, is that we would have the whole day to set-up and decorate and it's uncommon for them to schedule more than one wedding in a day.

As soon as we walked into the building, we were in love with it. It was actually better than the pictures and video we had seen. For one thing, there is a lot of natural light that shines through these big windows on each side of the room; my pet peeve is nice buildings with crappy lighting. It has a lot of space on the stage for everyone to stand and to have our huppah. They have a piano off to one side for Stella to play, and also an area for our bestman, Johnny, to play a song during the ceremony on his guitar. As you go through the main entrance, there is a double-sided iron and marble staircase that leads to a balcony that looks out over the sanctuary. The castle was built in 1922 and still has a very vintage feel. We didn't get to see the rest of the castle, but it has two other towers and hidden rooms from when it was a house. The whole place just had a really good vibe, and I'm more excited now than ever to get married there.

A Very Long Engagement Goes Long Distance

Today marks week 2 of Darryl living back home in Riverside, almost an hour away from me in Tustin. It's been an interesting week including Darryl getting the chicken pox, my office having a swine flu scare, and me trying to determine how to best manage our new long distance lifestyle on the weekdays that I am away from my betrothed. So far the longest we have been apart since the move is three days, so the time aspect isn't that big of a deal as of now; it's more just the fact that he doesn't live ten minutes away anymore so I can't just come right over anymore, and I can no longer rely on Darryl to come to my rescue for such occurances as locking my keys in my car, fainting at school, killing scary insects, etc. It's still an odd feeling that when I get home from work, unless I'm going to class, I'm staying home and not going out with Darryl for dinner and Starbucks. What's harder to fathom is that this could be the way it is for almost the next two years.

In an attempt to make the best of our new weekday lifestyle, I have begun exploring my many interests, not including as much wedding stuff. Darryl and I joke that I'm working on my MRS. during this period of time, which includes all kinds of things as we think of them, but the one thing that I'm most interested in is cooking. I began pouring over cookbooks, culinary magazines and websites, and even got an app on my (new!) iPhone for Whole Foods recipies. I'm determined to cook as organically and healthily as possible since I don't see much point in cooking whole meals unless I know that what I'm making is better health-wise than getting take-out. So far I have gone grocery shopping once, which was a much more frustrating experience than I had anticipated due to a lack of planning on my part, and have made one meal completely from scratch: whole wheat couscous with tomato and red pepper sauce and tofu. Despite how bad it might sound, it was actually quite good. Tomorrow, if I have time, I'm planning on making ratatouille and eating the leftovers for the rest of the week. My visions of making a different meal every night don't seem very feasible right now, especially when cooking only for myself in a very tiny kitchen that is not entirely my own. When every recipe requires buying all new spices and other stuff most people might have already stocked-up on, and always somehow buying more produce than I can use before it goes bad, it also isn't very cost effective. Hopefully by the time Darryl and I are on our own in our own place I will have learned how to manage a weekly menu and food budget more efficiently. For the sake of the wedding budget I'll have to start improving on the budget part asap.

Now it's time for bed and in the morning it's my day off which means breakfast out with Darryl after he gets out of work! :)

Photography blogs

I have spent the past few hours of my Saturday in Riverside clicking through wedding websites, but especially wedding photographer blogs. I hadn't realized until recently that most up-and-coming wedding photographers all have similarly designed websites and accompanying blogs where they post their most recent work and comment on it. It makes me want to take all of the photo brochures I collected at the last Mission Inn expo and shove them down the garbage disposal. Not only do the weddings look awesomely vintage and diy style, but the pictures really are the best I've seen so far, especially for the price. I am also both appreciative and amused that many of them have the same "no beach photoshoots, please" policy for engagement pictures as I do. Instead they have them in more creative, secluded locations of all kinds.

Jagger Photography: http://www.jaggerphotographyblog.com/

Dana and Jeremy Photography: http://www.dana-and-jeremy.com/

Stephanie Williams Photography: http://stephaniewilliamsphotography.com/blog/about/